Establishing Feelings 101: The Potassium Conundrum… a checklist of sorts

This was the list I had to write up to actually figure out if I had feelings for my girlfriend Kasey. Potassium’s element symbol being K… cause yeah autistic nerd here.

Being Ace/Demi makes dating fairly complicated as fuck because without initial sexual attraction as a sort of ‘hey I like this person a lot’ guide – navigating romantic feelings versus platonic feelings is a nightmare, at least for me. Almost all of my other relationships have been other people deciding they like me first and then telling me and then I’m like:

OH. What? You like me? That’s weird – I mean cool weird.

Which tends to open me up to romantic possibilities. I just tend to interact affectionately with everyone I’m friends with, if they’re cool with it, because that’s who I am. #relationshipanarchy Of course, that’s also gotten me into many an awkward scenario where I’m super affectionate and my friend ends up liking me romantically and I am definitely just very platonic in my feelings for them.

Anywhoodle, the list goes something like this!

  • Can picture romantic relationship Check
  • excitement, longing. missing the person, anticpation, butterflies? Check x 5
  • wanting to hold hands CHECK
  • wanting to hug/cuddle double check
  • comfort around this person yes ❤
  • have imagined kissing and it was good even though kissing can squick me out
  • when this person enters into a new relationship and I feel envious … pretty sure romantic feels
  • nervous anxiety – what if too late?? (note: both of us are polyamorous, I was mostly scared she was over me and that made me sad and anxious that I’d realized my feelings too late)